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Forbidden hopes. *

Sometimes when it gets really quiet, and the only company you have is yourself, this is when the shadows of the dreams you had come out to dabble with your mind.

The things you never dared say you wished for because, to speak the words made them real, and the pain of not getting, tenfold worse.

I am not certain what inspires these dreams or hopes.  Is it what we do not have? What we see? Or just how we feel? Perchance it is a combination of all, with each carving a different facet to a hidden aspiration. Eventually shaping a unique gem, glistening within ourselves, representing all the unspoken wishes.

The moments you allow yourself to contemplate these things grows rarer as you convince yourself they won’t, can’t or must not happen…you polish them then hide it all over again, deeper.

These things are to the individual like DNA, as is each step in our life journey, being carved for, or perhaps into us. I think they sometimes leave holes where they were meant to be, each unfulfilled hope an empty space destined to remain a void, ignored or covered over. Forgotten.

These things are individual as well.  You can not make someone else want what you do, no matter how you feel about them, with them, for them…because those hidden yearnings exist inside everyone.  You can not shape theirs anymore than they can shape yours, though that fabled thing called love can alter them a bit. Meld, combine and shift those gems if shared with another.

As we each have such a gem within, and if you are lucky to fulfill yours, they shine brilliantly through you, in your smile, your eyes, and the giving, caring, and loving which radiates out from you.

Of course that is my hypothesis of our inner hidden or abandoned dreams, hopes, desires.


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