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The Move (The Day Of)

Okay so the move is done – as in getting the pile of stuff from point A to point B – during the move I learned –  

  • 51 inch TVs can fit in the back of a hatchback when the movers refuse to take them.
  • Some men can look at a situation and try to sell that they did not notice the back door existed – it was not taking the couch out the back and over the fence then around that deterred them – no they were in fact blind to the existence of a back glass door and only saw the window.  

Fair Enough.  

  • Being a buffer is tiring at times.  
  • It does not matter who you are avoid moving when the one organizing it or initiating it is PMSing – she did not kill anyone but that COULD have been because all the knives were packed.  
  • Making said person laugh is hard but telling them to stop worrying is like telling a rattler to stop rattling and just as hazardous.  
  • The place will be full of loose screws, not possessed by just one person or confined to any box…steel toed boots and hard hat recommended…bullet proof vest a bonus…if the teenagers have hidden anything it will be found (usually by those moving in) and the next time someone mentions moving, have them admitted to a psych ward for everyone’s welfare and good mental health.  
  • Oh and write down appointment times when you want other people to meet inspectors, plumbers and the lot.  

Moving 101  

  • Something WILL get broken – the Moving God requires it – smashing a glass beforehand will not appease them – so try to make it something inexpensive and less depended upon.  
  • Some people will get over stressed – in fact if your dealing with it or look not stressed don’t stop moving – or start complaining – they feel better if your helping them row the stress boat.  
  • No one else will view your possessions like you do- internalize that and handle sentimental crap yourself – period.  
  • Try to be the one who does not get sick, hurt or lost during the move.  
  • When your the one breaking up verbal skirmishes know your the one they will both be pissed at and don’t start mumbling the “who is on first” skit OR singing 100 bottles of beer on the wall -unless  
  1. your too far away to get slapped
  2. there are a lot of boxes between you 
  3. you must have camera aimed and ready to capture the expressions
  4. you can duck when they throw things
  • positive reinforcement will gain you cuss words and promises of violence
  • the dog might be concerned about what is going on but they will always love you  
  • if your like me and shopping does not relieve stress – don’t feel bad about not going – watching someone put on a door with the hinge backward will not relieve your stress but it will distract you.  
  • Resisting the urge to say something or correct said issue yourself is wise – be wise  


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