If how horrible and depressed I feel right now is as good as this year will be, please forgive me for desiring to opt out.
As bad as my situation is, this evening leaves me sadder because tonight is, for many, a fun and lively night.
One friends family lost a son this evening.
One friend is laying in hospital, and everyone knows she has but a day or two left.
Another friend is going in for surgery in a couple weeks (cancer) and is not sure she will see the year out.
No phone rang with well wishes for the New year for me.
No one needed or wanted to hear my voice or know my thoughts.
I am left with the memory of a time when, despite having very little besides each other, and our pets, at least there was someone that wanted to hear me say Happy New Year, and give me a hug.
Perhaps that is as good as it will ever be, those moments that are in the fog of memory, at least they existed, once upon a time.
May everyone make it home safely this evening.